I remember my heart beat slowing down and my throat slowly closing up on me. This happened when I was 20 years old.
After losing my internship at Year Up, I decided to broaden my horizons and move to the east side of the Bay Area. I had already finished my 1st semester of community college and was working a fast food job whenever I was not in college. For those of you who have not gone to college or haven’t had your first job yet I’ll answer a question you might have. Which was easier to get? Surprisingly, the job. I had built rapport with the manager that was interviewing me. He offered me the job on the spot.
During those days my age and my ability to persuade people where some of my strongest resources.
However, not all of my resources where positive. During those days I would overvalue my strength and had these erroneous belief that the stronger mindset I had the less likely I would be to end up in a hospital.
Starting my 2nd semester of community college I was taking one Computer Science class along with a Chemistry class. I was working during the day and would go to class after work. Most classes during the afternoon and some right before the skies started to darken. With the money I had saved from working a fast food job I had hopes of starting a small freelancing business.
I would go to class afternoon and be surrounded by people in suits who seemed successful. They could have been bankers, lawyers or engineers. These are assumptions I made based on their body language, way of speaking and the way they would carry themselves.
Similar to Steve Jobs, I had weird traits during that time. Looking back at them I am certain these were flaws. At 20 years old I didn’t think that you’re hygiene or the way you dressed mattered that much. I also thought that waking up late was for weak people. Mark Zuckerberg’s philosophy on wearing the same shirt to save mental capacity, Steve Job’s belief that showering was an unnecessary waste of time or Tim Cook’s really early waking up schedule. My heroes were Bill Gates, Marissa Mayer and the ones mentioned above.
I believed you had to be a workaholic in order to be successful.
Since I wanted to get ahead in my Computer Science career I had decided to take 2 math classes that Summer. Trigonometry and Pre-Calculus.
I learned that I was in the wrong Pre-Calculus class since I wanted to become a Computer Science engineer. I stuck it out thinking this class would help me in the future. I gave it my all when it came to school thinking and hoping I would get a degree. Looking back at it it was pretty stressful and it felt more like a chore. I think if you want to study something you should enjoy the journey and the experience you get while you try to obtain your degree. From my small experience I believe you can study hard but still end up unemployed so maybe the best choice is to enjoy what you study without expecting to get money or a job out of it. Since it can take a long time to obtain a degree and college is a business.